Nooz Staff December 6, 2013

First Semester AEM Freshman Demands Goldman Sachs Summer Internship

After evaluating the many lucrative opportunities available to AEM majors, Dyson School freshman Jessica Stern decided it was time to let Goldman Sachs know she was ready to intern over the summer at the Wall Street conglomerate.  While Goldman has a strict policy against allowing inexperienced freshmen to intern for them, Jessica believes the skills she’s learned so far in one semester classes like Spreadsheet Modeling AEM 2200 and Management Communication AEM 2700 provide her with more business knowledge than most sophomores, “or may I dare to say, some juniors in Arts.”  She claims Dyson is “like Wharton, but at Cornell, actually, maybe even better than Wharton, yea, better than Wharton.”  Jessica believes her three months experience working at her local arcade/bowling alley back home has provided her with the skills to “effectively manage” and see “financial trends in specific pockets of the economy.”

Another strong point Jessica brings to the table is that if Goldman is foolish enough to pass on the best financial analyst in a “generation,” she’s sure other banks like “B of A” and “JPM” would love to have her at their respective firms.

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